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Last year I saw 37 theatrical releases. Obviously I have nothing better to do than to list them all in chronological order with short reviews.
Real Women Have Curves
A fun little 'teen girl tries to be more than her family thinks she can be' movie. Touching, sweet, and remarkable because there is a complete lack of reconciliation at the end.
Bowling for Columbine
I really liked TV Nation. Michael Moore is great -- in 15 minute segments. While Bowling made a lot of good points, some of it was so over the top that I wanted to pretend he wasn't on my side.
Catch Me If You Can
A nice, light, fluffy movie. Good to see that Spielberg can still do fun.
Chicago
I'm not a fan of musicals by default, but wow. Classic numbers (so classic even I had heard half of them) done very, very well.
Confessions of a Dangerous Mind
Weird. I'm a cultural heathen who had never heard of the book before the movie came out. But I can honestly say it made me wish I was a TV producer slash CIA assassin.
Bend It Like Beckham
More of the the spunky teen girl genre. And also quite good.
Russkij kovcheg (Russian Ark)
Gimmick alert: A single, 96 minute long take of 2000 actors in gorgeous period dress. It was pretty well done, but fairly pointless. Definitely prettier than Timecode, but far less plot.
Daredevil
Comics fall under my cultural heathenage, so I had never even heard of the source material before seeing the trailer for this. Fun, but empty and completely forgettable.
Hable con ella (Talk to Her)
I don't see what the big deal was about this movie. It just didn't do much for me either way. The faux silent film part was nicely surreal, at least.
Hunted, The
Utterly forgettable thriller. I wish they had spent more time on the blacksmithing aspects, though. I want to know how to forge a blade on a small island in the Columbia in a couple of hours.
Spider
Great mood piece. A bit tedious overall.
Gerry
I'm still not sure what I think about Gerry. 103 minutes of two guys wandering around a desert saying very, very little. It is so completely and utterly visual that writing about it is pointless.
Irréversible
It has been almost a year and there is still a bad taste in my throat because of this movie. It tried so hard to be shocking and exploitive and just ended up squalid and unwatchable. The swooping, rolling camera alone should get the makers lynched.
Core, The
Like Armegeddon, but good-bad instead of bad-bad. I wish they had left the line as 'star trek tapes' like in the early trailers instead of changing it to 'xena tapes'.
Pianist, The
Yet another holocaust movie. A very good one. But I don't think it really added anything to the genre. At least it was a Polanski film that didn't feature sexual assault as a plot point.
Tengoku no tobira (Cowboy Bebop)
Good, clean anime fun.
Bulletproof Monk
Silly and forgettable, but that's okay sometimes.
X2
Okay, I had heard of the X-Men before seeing the movies. But they are still the only contact I have had with the universe. Fun stuff, I guess. Pretty movies.
Matrix Reloaded, The
Get this: I really liked Matrix Reloaded. It outdid the first in terms of stunts. It expanded the universe and raised interesting questions. And it left me and several people I know paralized with fear that they were going to pull a really lame deus ex machina in the second. (A meta-matrix? Noooooo! There are several pictures from my wedding -- two days after the release -- of me geeking out in the corner over this possibility.)
Rivers and Tides
Mmmmm, nifty nifty artist biopic movie. We were inspired to play copycat on a camping trip the next week: the hyperconic section of destiny!.
Spellbound
Free tickets! I was afraid this movie would be really exploitive, but it was actually pretty sweet.
Winged Migration
Birdies! Lots and lots of birdies. Lots and lots of amazingly perfect shots.
28 Days Later
Mmmmm, scary fast zombies. And not so subtle messages about who the real monsters are. I still haven't watched the alternate endings on the DVD. I should.
Whale Rider
Yet another plucky teen girl defying authority!
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
This movie has it all. Pirates. Pirate zombie monkeys. Legolas. Pirates.
League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, The
Nope, didn't know this source material either. I'd like to, though. Not as bad as it was made out to be, but certainly not great.
Pulse: A Stomp Odyssey
Eh. It had some moments, but just putting it on IMAX doesn't make it worthwhile.
Lost in Translation
Yummy yum yum yum. Quiet and seductive. Sophia Coppola is scarygood.
Bubba Ho-tep
I loved the concept to death: Elvis and JFK team up in a retirement home to fight a mummy! I just wish they had made better use of it.
School of Rock
I'll admit it: Jack Black makes me laugh. School of Rock wasn't as good as I was hoping, but it was close. And the jam session under the credits was almost worth it by itself.
Underworld
Eh. Nothing special. Someday Hollywood will realize that world building is a serious art -- and that getting us to care about a fictional universe even artier.
Thirteen
Like Kids, but slightly more subtle. One of the young actors helped write the script, though. That's pretty cool.
Matrix Revolutions, The
Again: I actually liked it. And no meta-matrix! The defense of Zion sequence is amazing and I find the conclusion completely satisfactory. The opening 15 minutes is a bit rough, though. Why couldn't they have introduced the Trainguy in the last movie? I'm really hoping for an extended edition that fixed the pacing problem, maybe by editing both into a single movie. Oh, and yammering fanboys? It wasn't freaking ripping off Aliens. It was ripping of Dune Messiah, duh.
Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World
Pretty naval mini-epic. For some reason I really wish I didn't like Russel Crowe. But I do. Because he is very, very good.
Kill Bill: Vol. 1
Not as good as the hype made it out to be. The swordwork was pretty sloppy in places. The hospital sequence was just unpleasant. Overall lots of fun, though it was already so close to the edge of annoying overkill that I have to wonder how watchable Vol. 2 will be.
Last Samurai, The
Now we're talking. I usually really like to dislike Tom Cruise. But here he wasn't playing a rich playboy who gets all the babes, wearing that I'm-not-even-bothering-to-act,-this-is-my-real-life-you-know smirk, so he wasn't bad. Lots of pretty Japanese details. An amazing death scene at the end.
Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, The
Not as good as Fellowship. Much better than Two Towers. And most of its failings came from being too short. There are several obvious places for extended footage material to go. It just might come close to FotR at that point.
Real Women Have Curves
A fun little 'teen girl tries to be more than her family thinks she can be' movie. Touching, sweet, and remarkable because there is a complete lack of reconciliation at the end.
Bowling for Columbine
I really liked TV Nation. Michael Moore is great -- in 15 minute segments. While Bowling made a lot of good points, some of it was so over the top that I wanted to pretend he wasn't on my side.
Catch Me If You Can
A nice, light, fluffy movie. Good to see that Spielberg can still do fun.
Chicago
I'm not a fan of musicals by default, but wow. Classic numbers (so classic even I had heard half of them) done very, very well.
Confessions of a Dangerous Mind
Weird. I'm a cultural heathen who had never heard of the book before the movie came out. But I can honestly say it made me wish I was a TV producer slash CIA assassin.
Bend It Like Beckham
More of the the spunky teen girl genre. And also quite good.
Russkij kovcheg (Russian Ark)
Gimmick alert: A single, 96 minute long take of 2000 actors in gorgeous period dress. It was pretty well done, but fairly pointless. Definitely prettier than Timecode, but far less plot.
Daredevil
Comics fall under my cultural heathenage, so I had never even heard of the source material before seeing the trailer for this. Fun, but empty and completely forgettable.
Hable con ella (Talk to Her)
I don't see what the big deal was about this movie. It just didn't do much for me either way. The faux silent film part was nicely surreal, at least.
Hunted, The
Utterly forgettable thriller. I wish they had spent more time on the blacksmithing aspects, though. I want to know how to forge a blade on a small island in the Columbia in a couple of hours.
Spider
Great mood piece. A bit tedious overall.
Gerry
I'm still not sure what I think about Gerry. 103 minutes of two guys wandering around a desert saying very, very little. It is so completely and utterly visual that writing about it is pointless.
Irréversible
It has been almost a year and there is still a bad taste in my throat because of this movie. It tried so hard to be shocking and exploitive and just ended up squalid and unwatchable. The swooping, rolling camera alone should get the makers lynched.
Core, The
Like Armegeddon, but good-bad instead of bad-bad. I wish they had left the line as 'star trek tapes' like in the early trailers instead of changing it to 'xena tapes'.
Pianist, The
Yet another holocaust movie. A very good one. But I don't think it really added anything to the genre. At least it was a Polanski film that didn't feature sexual assault as a plot point.
Tengoku no tobira (Cowboy Bebop)
Good, clean anime fun.
Bulletproof Monk
Silly and forgettable, but that's okay sometimes.
X2
Okay, I had heard of the X-Men before seeing the movies. But they are still the only contact I have had with the universe. Fun stuff, I guess. Pretty movies.
Matrix Reloaded, The
Get this: I really liked Matrix Reloaded. It outdid the first in terms of stunts. It expanded the universe and raised interesting questions. And it left me and several people I know paralized with fear that they were going to pull a really lame deus ex machina in the second. (A meta-matrix? Noooooo! There are several pictures from my wedding -- two days after the release -- of me geeking out in the corner over this possibility.)
Rivers and Tides
Mmmmm, nifty nifty artist biopic movie. We were inspired to play copycat on a camping trip the next week: the hyperconic section of destiny!.
Spellbound
Free tickets! I was afraid this movie would be really exploitive, but it was actually pretty sweet.
Winged Migration
Birdies! Lots and lots of birdies. Lots and lots of amazingly perfect shots.
28 Days Later
Mmmmm, scary fast zombies. And not so subtle messages about who the real monsters are. I still haven't watched the alternate endings on the DVD. I should.
Whale Rider
Yet another plucky teen girl defying authority!
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
This movie has it all. Pirates. Pirate zombie monkeys. Legolas. Pirates.
League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, The
Nope, didn't know this source material either. I'd like to, though. Not as bad as it was made out to be, but certainly not great.
Pulse: A Stomp Odyssey
Eh. It had some moments, but just putting it on IMAX doesn't make it worthwhile.
Lost in Translation
Yummy yum yum yum. Quiet and seductive. Sophia Coppola is scarygood.
Bubba Ho-tep
I loved the concept to death: Elvis and JFK team up in a retirement home to fight a mummy! I just wish they had made better use of it.
School of Rock
I'll admit it: Jack Black makes me laugh. School of Rock wasn't as good as I was hoping, but it was close. And the jam session under the credits was almost worth it by itself.
Underworld
Eh. Nothing special. Someday Hollywood will realize that world building is a serious art -- and that getting us to care about a fictional universe even artier.
Thirteen
Like Kids, but slightly more subtle. One of the young actors helped write the script, though. That's pretty cool.
Matrix Revolutions, The
Again: I actually liked it. And no meta-matrix! The defense of Zion sequence is amazing and I find the conclusion completely satisfactory. The opening 15 minutes is a bit rough, though. Why couldn't they have introduced the Trainguy in the last movie? I'm really hoping for an extended edition that fixed the pacing problem, maybe by editing both into a single movie. Oh, and yammering fanboys? It wasn't freaking ripping off Aliens. It was ripping of Dune Messiah, duh.
Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World
Pretty naval mini-epic. For some reason I really wish I didn't like Russel Crowe. But I do. Because he is very, very good.
Kill Bill: Vol. 1
Not as good as the hype made it out to be. The swordwork was pretty sloppy in places. The hospital sequence was just unpleasant. Overall lots of fun, though it was already so close to the edge of annoying overkill that I have to wonder how watchable Vol. 2 will be.
Last Samurai, The
Now we're talking. I usually really like to dislike Tom Cruise. But here he wasn't playing a rich playboy who gets all the babes, wearing that I'm-not-even-bothering-to-act,-this-is-my-real-life-you-know smirk, so he wasn't bad. Lots of pretty Japanese details. An amazing death scene at the end.
Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, The
Not as good as Fellowship. Much better than Two Towers. And most of its failings came from being too short. There are several obvious places for extended footage material to go. It just might come close to FotR at that point.