It's Late. Sue me.

All the BBC articles referencing horrible things happening in 'DR Congo' keep making me picture a pulp era comic book villain:

"So, Dr. Congo, we meet again. You realize, of course, that I cannot allow your evil scheme to go on."

"What do you plan to do about it, Blue Helmet? Your precious Security Council is powerless against me. The puny force they have authorized will be no more than an annoyance."

"Even now they are receiving details of the full extent of your atrocities. They will soon authorize more. Surrender now and maybe the World Court will go easy on you."

"They will do no such thing... not as long as I hold Kofi Annan prisoner! If you or any other peacekeeper get within a mile of my Fortress of Genocide, I will be forced to feed him to my mutant cannibal pygmies."

"You wouldn't!"

"Do you really think Dag Hammarskjold's death¹ was an accident? I'll do it again if need be. Dr. Congo laughs at UN intervention! Muahahaha! Muahahahaha! Muahahahahahaha!"

Will our hero be able to save Kofi Annan? Will the french led force be enough to impose order in the Ituri province? Tune in next week for another exciting episode of BLUE HELMET AND THE PEACEKEEPERS.

---

1: Dag Hammarskjold was, in fact, killed in a plane crash on a peace mission to the Congo in 1961. So this is really funny, as far as UN jokes go.

Meta-Dorkery

Now I'm really wishing I could draw so I could do a few panels of The Blue Helmet. If anyone out there wants to, I'd love you forever. You might even get smooches out of it, depending who you are.

Speaking of the UN...

Last night I dreamed I was applying to be a 'civilian weapons inspector' in Iraq. (I don't really know what a civilian weapons inspector would be, or who would be sending them under what authority. But it wasn't the UN -- no blue. More black and red. Probably triggered by this article.) I didn't make the cut for some reason. Then I was wandering around some kind of exhibition showing off the winners. I was intensely jealous, mostly because they got really cool equipment kits. I remember that vixyish wasn't very sad at all that I wasn't chosen.

Not Related to the UN Even a Little Bit

I finally changed the oil in the car today. It went pretty well, though on the first try I drove completely over the ramps, dropping the car 10 inches and crunching the underbelly a bit. No real harm done that I could tell. Something was dripping, but as far as I could tell it was just condensation from the environmental systems. Never having crawled around under the car before, I easily could have missed the phenomenon. It was a nervous 30 seconds before I convinced myself it wasn't gasoline, though.